Being Nice Doesn’t Cost A Thing

A young man, who had just been named the new head coach of a major division 1 football program was on the road in the middle of nowhere America looking for a prospect who was supposed to be a pretty good player.

Getting hungry and looking for a bite, he spotted an old cinderblock building standing alone with a small sign out front that simply said “Restaurant.” The young ball coach pulled up, parked and went in. As he opened the door, every head in the place turned. The young, white, ball coach was the only white person in the restaurant.

The coach grabs a seat at the bar and is approached by a big fella in a tee shirt and cap who says, “What do you need?”

The ball coach replies, “I’m looking for some food, what is good?”

The big fella replies, “You probably won’t like it here. Today we’re having chitlins, collard greens, and black eyed peas with cornbread. I’ll bet you don’t even know what chitlins are?”

The new head coach looked the man dead in his eyes and said “I’m from the south and have probably eaten a miles worth of chitlins. Sounds like I’m in the right place.”

The man replies, “You may be from the South, but you aren’t from around here are you?”

The coach explains he is on the road recruiting and is looking for a school so he can check out a player. The man gives him directions and after he is done eating, asks him if he has a photo to hang up in the restaurant. The coach, so green on the job, didn’t, but takes a napkin and asks the man for his name and address and tells him he’ll send him a photo. Sure enough, as soon as the coach got back on campus later that evening, he grabbed a photo and wrote, “Thanks for the best lunch I’ve ever had.”

Fast forward, years later and the ball coach has built a very strong football program and is back down in the same area he ate at so many years ago recruiting an elite offensive lineman. A player the coach desperately wanted and the team desperately needed. Problem was, word on the recruiting trail had the kid going to a rival school. In fact the kid told the head coach this.

Disappointed, back in his office a couple days later, the coach’s phone rings. On the other end, it’s the kid, the top recruit, he says, “Coach, you still want me?”

The Coach says, “You bet I do.” He asks, “What changed your mind?”

The kid replies, “When my grandpa found out that I had the chance to play for you and said no, he pitched a fit and told me I wasn’t going to play for anyone else. He said he thinks a whole lot of you and has ever since ya’ll met.”

The coach was floored, but confused, “Who is your grandaddy?”

The kid says, “You probably don’t remember him, but you ate at his restaurant your first year at Alabama and you sent him a picture that he’s had hung in his place ever since. That picture is his pride and joy and he still tells everybody about the day that Bear Bryant came in and had chitlins with him.” #bekind #lawyerkind

Art of Storytelling

Law school gives you the license to lawyer, but knowing how to tell a story separates lawyers with licenses.

Stories light our brains up. People learn, remember, identify and attach to stories. The science says so; our experiences remind us so.  Tell a good story and the listener is more likely to not only remember what you said, but do what you ask.  For lawyers, stories are the vehicle toward a favorable verdict. 

Look no further than The Karate Kid, a 1984 classic about an underdog Daniel who has just moved to Southern California with his mother, and quickly finds himself the target of a group of bullies who study karate at the Cobra Kai dojo. Fortunately, Daniel befriends Mr. Miyagi an unassuming repairman who just happens to be a martial arts master himself. Miyagi takes Daniel under his wing, training him in a more compassionate form of karate and preparing him to compete and ultimately defeat the brutal Cobra Kai.

But was Daniel Larusso bullied or the bully? I

This video above was created by J. Matthew Turner and is being used for educational purposes. His youtube channel can be found here.

Real World Lawyering Jargon: Acronyms

Legal Acronyms used by lawyers

Part of lawyering is knowing (or pretending to know) what you’re doing. To do so, you have to speak lawyer and you can’t speak lawyer unless you are aware of the legal acronym game.

Civil Lawyering Acronyms

D:                    Defendant

P:                     Plaintiff

DOL:                Date of Loss

DWOP:            Dismiss Without Prejudice

DWQ:              Disposition by Written Question

EUO:               Examination Under Oath

JNOV:              Motion For Judgment Notwithstanding Verdict

MSJ:                Motion for Summary Judgment

TI:                   Temporary Injunction

Criminal Lawyering Acronyms

ADA:                Assistant District Attorney

DA:                  District Attorney

D:                    Defendant

AUSA:              Federal Assistant United States Attorney

CW:                 Complaining Witness

CS:                   Community Supervision

DNF:                Did Not File

DOEP:             Drug Offender Education Program

DW:                 Deadly Weapon

GFT:                Good For Trial

LPO:                Loss Prevention Officer

MAG/MADJ:   Motion to Adjudicate Guilt

MOEP:            Magistrates Order of Emergency Protection

MNT:               Motion for New Trial

MRP:               Motion to Revoke Probation

MTD:               Motion to Dismiss

MTS:               Motion to Suppress

PC:                  Probable Cause

NG:                  Not Guilty

PDR:                Petition for Discretionary Review

PO:                  Probation or Parole Officer or Protective Order

SJ:                    State Jail

TDCJ:              Texas Department of Corrections (i.e. prison)

UA:                  Urine Analysis

Child Protective Services (CPS) Lawyer Acronyms

FGC:    Family Group Conference

RO:      Ruled Out

RTB:    Reason to Believe

UTD:   Unable to Determine

Family Lawyering Acronyms

CS:                   Child Support

CP:                  Community Property

ESPO:              Extended Standard Possession Order

IOP:                 Intensive Out Patient

JMC:                Joint Managing Conservator

MC:                 Managing Conservator

MOEP:             Magistrate’s Order of Emergency Protection

OEP:                Order of Emergency Protection

PC:                  Possessory Conservation

PO:                  Protective Order

SOP:                Supportive Out Patient

SP:                   Separate Property

SPO:                Standard Possession Order

Immigration Lawyering Acronyms

EWI/IWI         Entry without Inspection

NOID               Notice of Intent to Deny

SIJ:                  Special Immigrant Juvenile

VD:                  Voluntary Departure

Mediation & Arbitration Lawyering Acronyms

ADR                 Alternative Dispute Resolution

BATNA:            Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

COM:               Court Ordered Mediation

DRC:                Dispute Resolution Center

EATNA:           Estimated Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

MLATNA         Most Likely Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

MOU:              Memorandum of Understanding

MSA:               Mediation Settlement Agreement

WATNA:          Worst Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement

Probate & Guardianship Acronyms

AOH:               Affidavit of Heirship

AAL/GAL:        Attorney/Guardian Ad Litem

BK:                  Bankruptcy

CP:                  Community Property

DOH:               Determination of Heirship

G-Ship:            Guardianship

GOP/GOE:      Guardian of Person/Estate

H-Ship:           Heirship

SEA:                Small Estate Affidavit

SP:                   Separate Property

T’EE:               Trustee

T’OR:               Testator

Real Estate & Transactional Lawyering Acronyms

AP:                  Adverse Possession

BPO:                Broker’s Price Opinion

CRE:                Commercial Real Estate

DIL:                 Deed In Lieu of Foreclosure

DOT:               Deed of Trust

EMK:               Earnest Money Contract

EML:               Existing Mineral Lease

EV:                  Eviction

GWD:              General Warranty Deed

LL:                   Landlord

PN:                  Promissory Note

POT:                Paid Outside of Title

POC:                Point of Contact 

RE:                  Real Estate

REA:                Real Estate Agent

REI:                 Real Estate Investor

RMLO:             Residential Mortgage Lease Option

SWD:               Special Warranty Deed

T:                     Tenant

TI:                   Temporary Injunction

TP:                  Tax Payer

WD/VL:          Warranty Deed with Vendor’s Lien

Other Lawyering Acronyms

B/4:                Before

BRA:                Business Records Affidavit

EE:                  Employee

ER:                  Employer

FOF:                Finder of Fact

FTA:                Failure to Appear

IAC:                 Ineffective Assistance of Counsel

LM:                  Left Message

LMTCB:           Left Message to Call Back

MTD:               Motion to Dismiss

PNC:                Potential New Client

POA:                Power of Attorney

SOL:                Statute of Limitations

UPL:                Unauthorized Practice of Law

W/R:               Whether

And of course when all else fails there is always, POS, SOB, FU & WTF.

If the Suit Fits, You Must Acquit.

More important than the brand, suit fit determines sophistication. Lawyering is persuasion and to persuade you must look good and feel good. Look good, feel good, persuade good, lawyer good.

The Lawyer’s Suit – Jacket Shoulders

The Shoulder Fit for the Lawyer's Suit Jacket
The shoulder line should be clean without lumps and/or wrinkles

The Lawyer’s Suit – Jacket Length

Proper length (from side): end near middle of the hand
Proper length (from front): end near bottom zipper of pants
Proper sleeve length: end near large wrist bone.

Proper suit jacket fit for lawyers

The Lawyer’s Suit – Jacket Closure

Lawyer Suit Proper Fit Jacket Pull

The Lawyer’s Suit – Pants

The pant “break” is the fold or bend above where the pants end. Whether or not to have a “break” is a matter of preference (as is cuffs vs. no cuffs and pleats vs. no pleats)

The pant waist should be fit snug enough to be worn with or without a belt.

The sophisticated lawyer prefers a proper, yet slim fit suit with no pleats, no break and no cuffs.

Suit Buying for the Lawyer

Sure you can have a personal stylist come to your office, measure you and pay well into the thousands for a suit.

In the alternative, with your measurements in hand you can wait for 1/2 year and year end sales at major retail stores and spend a third of the money for equal gear.

How many drinks to get drunk?

Regardless of your field of practice, if you’re a lawyer you can bet the house you will be asked about DWI; What do i do if I am pulled over and have been drinking? How many drinks does it take to get drunk? Below, provides an explanation of how many drinks it may take to become intoxicated under the law. 

How is intoxication defined?

Most states define intoxication as having lost the normal use of one’s mental and/or physical faculties or having a blood alcohol level 0.08 or higher at the time of driving.

Calculating your blood alcohol content (BAC)

For an old school way of calculating your blood alcohol level, keep reading. For the new school way of doing it, you can type “blood alcohol calculator”into Google and find a number of online calculators.

Widmark Formula – the OG of Blood Alcohol Calculations

The most widely known formula for calculating blood alcohol content is the Widmark formula, named for Swedish Scientist, Erik M.P. Widmark (1889-1954) who was considered a pioneer in forensic toxicology.

The Widmark formulafocuses on how alcohol behaves in the body from the time it is consumed to the time it is eliminated.

Widmark Formula

Blood Alcohol Content = [alcohol consumed in grams / (body weight in grams x r)] x 100

(“r” refers to the distribution of water in the bodyand is a constant number of 0.55 for females and 0.68 for males)

A standard drink = one 12 oz beer, one 5 oz glass of wine, or one 1 ½ oz shot of liquor.

A standard drink is 14 grams.

Beginning the calculation of your blood alcohol level:

1) Alcohol consumed in grams (i.e. how much have you had to drink):

  • Standard drinks consumed x 14 = alcohol consumed in grams.

2) Body weight in grams:

  • Body weight in pounds x 454 = body weight in grams

3) Body weight in grams x “r”

  • Body weight in grams x (0.55 for females or 0.68 for males)

4) Blood Alcohol Content (BAC)

  • Plug in the numbers and multiply by 100 = Blood Alcohol Content

5) How long have you been drinking?

  • Blood Alcohol Content – (Number of hours since drinking started x 0.015) = Approximate Blood Alcohol Content

0.015 refers our the rate our bodies metabolize alcohol per every hour.

This formula and any other online blood alcohol content calculator is an approximation at best. Because two people are not alike, there are many factors that impact the way a person’s body metabolizes alcohol. Also, Blood alcohol concentration is a percentage of ethanol/alcohol in the blood. For example a 0.08 means there are 0.08 grams of alcohol for every 100 mL of blood.

See below a chart that approximates your blood alcohol level based on number of drinks, number of hours spent drinking and body weight.

Blood alcohol levels (BAC) for men
Blood alcohol levels (BAC) for women

In calculating your blood alcohol level over a period of time you would subtract 0.015 for every hour spent drinking. For example, if you were a 200 lb. male who had 8 drinks you would find 0.15 on the chart above. If you had those 8 drinks over 3 hours you would subtract 0.045 (0.015 * 3 hours) from 0.15. Thus, your approximate BAC would be 0.10 (o.15 – 0.045).